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Talking today with an old friend I realized something – happiness ♥ ♫ ♥
No…I didn’t realize anything in that way, but a smile was definitely there! ^_^
Are you what the society says you are? Or are you what nature made you - a soul and a body?
In life we are all linked to different social standards that we learn since we are very little. Kindergarten, school, work, marry, have children etc. There is a societal pressure on you from the day you set eyes on this life, from the things you eat to the things you spit. These are the rules that a group uses for appropriate and inappropriate values, beliefs, attitudes and behaviours. These rules may be explicit or implicit.
And more you get into these things more they overload you and you become them. I have to do this and that…It’s like a scale. And then the question comes “Where are you on that scale?”’
Norms are mostly transmitted by non-verbal behaviour, for example with “dirty looks” when people act outside the norms. They may also be transmitted through stories, rituals and role-model behaviour.
There are groups that evolve around common opportunities for growth, such as those formed in neighborhoods and/ or in college/ university. These groups usually have diffuse boundaries and the members are attracted together by a common willing scope. There are also other types of groups that develop around family or work. In these cases, the jointure is not necessarily the product of a common desired outcome, but is influenced by external factors. As an example, children don’t choose their parents, and workers don’t choose their co-workers. It doesn’t mean that these groups are not influenced by a certain attraction, but the first bound is an external factor defying the laws of attraction. We can even say that there is not a “group” that we are talking about in these cases, but an assembly. An individual is attracted by a certain group as he expects a certain rewarding association. The attraction to a certain group means the individual is seeking social acceptance among them. Most individuals have the tendency to want to impress others. This fight for a certain “supremacy” creates differentiations. It comes to the group to accept or counter these differences. (my comments are influenced by Exchange and power in social life By Peter M. Blau)
Of course, the social norms depend on what society you are living in. It refers to the normal expected actions of the members of its society.
“Norms are efficient means to achieve social welfare (Arrow 1971, Akerlof 1976), prevent market failures (Coleman 1989) or cut social costs (Thibaut and Kelley 1959, Homans 1961); norms are either Nash equilibria of coordination games or cooperative equilibria of prisoner's dilemma-type games (Lewis 1969, Ullmann-Margalit 1977), and as such they solve collective action problems.
But, a norm cannot simply be identified with a recurrent, collective behavioral pattern.” (Social Norms- First published Tue Mar 1, 2011 from Standford Encyclopaedia of Philosophy)
Interesting, isn’t it? But, you are still wandering what is my point…
As an example, the fact that you brush your teeth every day doesn’t mean that everybody else will do so. Having normative beliefs and expecting others to behave according to a given norm does not always result in norm-abiding behavior. Normative beliefs are ones' beliefs about the extent to which other people who are important to them think they should or should not perform... Maybe the groups? In other words, on that life scale as I mentioned before in a previous post: Your “made it” may not be the same with their “made it”.
The social identity is “that part of an individual's self-concept which derives from his knowledge of his membership of a social group (or groups) together with the value and emotional significance attached to that membership”. (Tajfel 1981- Human groups and social categories, Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.)
Finding your social identity mean you start perceiving yourself and your fellow group-members along impersonal, “typical” dimensions that characterize the group to which you belong. Such dimensions include specific roles, and the beliefs/actions that accompany them. In the social identity framework, norms are defined as collective (as opposed to personal) beliefs about what actions are appropriate in a group-membership context.
My question is very simple then what happens when you fail those social standards? When you get fired…when you divorce…when you lose your children…when you abandon school…when you are abandoned…Does that make you a loser?
By certain standards – yes! In these cases the group that once received you now may reject you. It’s clear: you have lost your social identity. Imagine you are 50 years old, you have a “wonderful life” – a spose, kids, an excellent job, a house…, and then you no longer have any of those. You fall into a deep depression. But who said you had a “wonderful life”? The group to which you belonged – that society. In other words, you can still have a wonderful life by the standards of other groups even if you are divorced, with no kids, with no job, with not a fix place to stay. Why? Because you are what nature made you in the first place – a body and a soul. You have a body to help you move around or just to hold your brain and you have a mind to help you think. This is the real you.
Happiness ♥ ♫ ♥ ? You will find peace the moment you accept the natural you. And happiness is also a standard that you impose upon you, related to your values and your relation to certain social groups.
Happy people? We are all happy people – we are just focused on different societal areas!
The relative importance of emotions versus normative beliefs for life satisfaction judgments was compared among individualist and collectivist nations in 2 large sets of international data (in total, 61 nations, N = 62,446). Among nations, emotions and life satisfaction correlated significantly more strongly in more individualistic nations (r = .52 in Study 1; r = .48 in Study 2). At the individual level, emotions were far superior predictors of life satisfaction to norms (social approval of life satisfaction) in individualist cultures, whereas norms and emotions were equally strong predictors of life satisfaction in collectivist cultures. The present findings have implications for future studies on cultural notions of well-being, the functional value of emotional experiences, and individual differences in life satisfaction profiles. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA)
No…I didn’t realize anything in that way, but a smile was definitely there! ^_^
Are you what the society says you are? Or are you what nature made you - a soul and a body?
In life we are all linked to different social standards that we learn since we are very little. Kindergarten, school, work, marry, have children etc. There is a societal pressure on you from the day you set eyes on this life, from the things you eat to the things you spit. These are the rules that a group uses for appropriate and inappropriate values, beliefs, attitudes and behaviours. These rules may be explicit or implicit.
And more you get into these things more they overload you and you become them. I have to do this and that…It’s like a scale. And then the question comes “Where are you on that scale?”’
Norms are mostly transmitted by non-verbal behaviour, for example with “dirty looks” when people act outside the norms. They may also be transmitted through stories, rituals and role-model behaviour.
There are groups that evolve around common opportunities for growth, such as those formed in neighborhoods and/ or in college/ university. These groups usually have diffuse boundaries and the members are attracted together by a common willing scope. There are also other types of groups that develop around family or work. In these cases, the jointure is not necessarily the product of a common desired outcome, but is influenced by external factors. As an example, children don’t choose their parents, and workers don’t choose their co-workers. It doesn’t mean that these groups are not influenced by a certain attraction, but the first bound is an external factor defying the laws of attraction. We can even say that there is not a “group” that we are talking about in these cases, but an assembly. An individual is attracted by a certain group as he expects a certain rewarding association. The attraction to a certain group means the individual is seeking social acceptance among them. Most individuals have the tendency to want to impress others. This fight for a certain “supremacy” creates differentiations. It comes to the group to accept or counter these differences. (my comments are influenced by Exchange and power in social life By Peter M. Blau)
Of course, the social norms depend on what society you are living in. It refers to the normal expected actions of the members of its society.
“Norms are efficient means to achieve social welfare (Arrow 1971, Akerlof 1976), prevent market failures (Coleman 1989) or cut social costs (Thibaut and Kelley 1959, Homans 1961); norms are either Nash equilibria of coordination games or cooperative equilibria of prisoner's dilemma-type games (Lewis 1969, Ullmann-Margalit 1977), and as such they solve collective action problems.
But, a norm cannot simply be identified with a recurrent, collective behavioral pattern.” (Social Norms- First published Tue Mar 1, 2011 from Standford Encyclopaedia of Philosophy)
Interesting, isn’t it? But, you are still wandering what is my point…
As an example, the fact that you brush your teeth every day doesn’t mean that everybody else will do so. Having normative beliefs and expecting others to behave according to a given norm does not always result in norm-abiding behavior. Normative beliefs are ones' beliefs about the extent to which other people who are important to them think they should or should not perform... Maybe the groups? In other words, on that life scale as I mentioned before in a previous post: Your “made it” may not be the same with their “made it”.
The social identity is “that part of an individual's self-concept which derives from his knowledge of his membership of a social group (or groups) together with the value and emotional significance attached to that membership”. (Tajfel 1981- Human groups and social categories, Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.)
Finding your social identity mean you start perceiving yourself and your fellow group-members along impersonal, “typical” dimensions that characterize the group to which you belong. Such dimensions include specific roles, and the beliefs/actions that accompany them. In the social identity framework, norms are defined as collective (as opposed to personal) beliefs about what actions are appropriate in a group-membership context.
My question is very simple then what happens when you fail those social standards? When you get fired…when you divorce…when you lose your children…when you abandon school…when you are abandoned…Does that make you a loser?
Happiness ♥ ♫ ♥ ? You will find peace the moment you accept the natural you. And happiness is also a standard that you impose upon you, related to your values and your relation to certain social groups.
Happy people? We are all happy people – we are just focused on different societal areas!
The relative importance of emotions versus normative beliefs for life satisfaction judgments was compared among individualist and collectivist nations in 2 large sets of international data (in total, 61 nations, N = 62,446). Among nations, emotions and life satisfaction correlated significantly more strongly in more individualistic nations (r = .52 in Study 1; r = .48 in Study 2). At the individual level, emotions were far superior predictors of life satisfaction to norms (social approval of life satisfaction) in individualist cultures, whereas norms and emotions were equally strong predictors of life satisfaction in collectivist cultures. The present findings have implications for future studies on cultural notions of well-being, the functional value of emotional experiences, and individual differences in life satisfaction profiles. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA)
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